An Ode to the Good Skating Student

In honor of my last week as a figure skating coach at my current rink, I am going to take this opportunity to wax rhapsodic about The Good Skating Student. I considered whining and ranting about The Bad Skating Student, but that seemed to lack a little taste.

The Good Skating Student, first and foremost, loves to skate. This may seem like a silly thing to say, but when you consider the number of students who have to be cajoled, teased, bribed, or just plain dragged on to the ice (either by me or their parents), anyone who is delighted to step on the ice is automatically awesome. They don’t necessarily have to be naturally talented at skating, but they have to want to do it.

The Good Skating Student, in fact, loves skating so much that he or she will come in and practice on their own in between lessons. Frequently this student will be dragging the parents to the ice rink instead of the other way around (I was this type of student. My poor parents will never get back the years of their life they spent carting me too and from the rink until I got my license), and the parents are usually all too happy to complain to me that they can’t get their kid off this ice. In fact, a sure sign of a Good Skating Student can be found by looking at the student’s parents. Do they have bags and dark shadows under their eyes? If they do, it is a good sign that you have a Good Skating Student on your hands and that you should celebrate, no matter how sleep deprived the parents get (I sincerely hope that if I have children, they do not turn out to be Good Skating Students, because I want to sleep more than I let my parents sleep).

As a result of this incessant practicing, the Good Skating Student will tend to pick things up very quickly. This isn’t a necessary part of being the Good Skating Student, but it is a nice little bonus. However, this doesn’t guarantee that the Good Skating Student will master everything immediately. One of my Good Skating Students this session is struggling mightily with her scratch spin. And pretty much every Good Skating Student around will run into a bit of trouble with the axel. But let us not ruin this happy discussion of Good Skating Students with a subject as fraught with devastation as the axel.

The Good Skating Student also is capable of listening. The student’s ability to stand still for 1.8 seconds while the coach offers up a quick tip is especially appreciated. Even better, the Good Skating Student can actually apply the quick tip the coach has just offered! This makes the coach feel like they are actually, well, coaching, rather than standing around giving Shakespearean soliloquies on skating, only without an audience (and the audience is essential to the Shakespearean soliloquy, because anyone else who wandered around debating whether or not to run away for one’s master, à la Lancelot Gobbo in The Merchant of Venice, would be considered insane).

Due to the Good Skating Student’s excellent listening skills, said student is very on top of skating terminology. The Good Skating Student will never look at me like I’m a madwoman when I ask to see a right outside three turn. And after I ask to see that, the Good Skating Student will not promptly show me a left inside three turn. Or a right inside three turn. Or a mohawk. Or a pivot. I reiterate once more, I do not care if the student fails to complete a successful right outside three turn, but if they are on the right foot and the correct edge going into it, then I am a happy happy coach! Any extra awesome Good Skating Student will in fact remember the name of almost everything, and thus not require that the aging coach (with arthritis in several joints and really numb feet because the coach is too poor to buy a properly fitted pair of skates) demonstrate the same thing every single week. This is most likely the best thing about the Good Skating Student.

Finally, Good Skating Students makes sure that their skate laces are tied well and are not about to snap prior to competing so that they do have to stop halfway through and weep to get the pity of the judges. This is in poor form. They also do not get involved with significant others who will hire people to whack the knees of their competition. That is especially poor form.

Skating Student Quote of the Day: Hello, young lovers, whoever you are, I hope your troubles are few

From a 6th grade guy, talking to one of his friends at the rink: "Relationship troubles, huh?"

Testing Week: Pass or Retry?

Tomorrow is the last day of testing week at the ice rink.

Testing week is a trauma-filled week. When I was learning how to skate, I agonized. The first time I failed, I cried the entire evening. My coach for that session very kindly called that evening to give me some comfort and motivation. I'm afraid I don't remember anything he said, mostly because I was just sniffling and saying "Mhmmm" at appropriate moments. I like to think that he imparted some very key wisdom upon me, because I don't remember being that upset about a test again until I failed an ice dance test about five or six years later. It's a shame I don't remember it, because I'd love to impart similarly sage advice upon my skaters so that they'd stop being upset with failing.

I mistakenly assumed that agonizing over tests would end when I became a coach. Oh, how wrong I was. The other side of testing is probably even more wrought with emotional distress, because on the other side you have power. And it is terrifying. I don't want to make children cry! I don't want them to quit skating because of a setback! And I definitely don't want their parents unhappy with me because they don't pass. But I've also taught the students who probably shouldn't have been moved up a level, and the next level is even harder for them since they don't have the skills to build upon. It's also harder for the coach, because we then have to work on developing skills that the skaters should've already learned. You cannot win (unless the skater is clearly ready to pass--then you both win).

My only comfort is the fact that I'm merely a skating instructor, not an official USFSA judge. USFSA testing takes place in front of a panel (usually of three judges) and this is even more trauma-inducing that Learn to Skate testing. For that, you have to pay just to take a test, and after you fail, you're required to wait at least another month before you test again. I don't think I could take the pressure. Of course, I don't think it's standard practice for parents to challenge those judges and insist that the judges are mistaken, so that's a definite benefit.

Linguistic note of the day: I love all the euphemisms skating will find to say you failed. In Basic Skills you don't fail, you just need improvement, and with USFSA tests, you simply will have to retry. My coaches would frequently tell us stories about how in their day, you didn't retry, you simply failed and there was nothing you could do about it. No sugarcoating things for them. They all made it through okay, so maybe I don't have to worry nearly as much about traumatizing the next generation of skaters.